Try this

VIA

the coolest you'll look pooping your pants

AMAZING

I ENDORSE THIS

We've been thinking it for two long years. All of us. Gnawing our cheeks at night, clutching at sweaty sheets, our faces hollow and gray, our once-bright eyes dimmed by the pain of too many questions. Sometimes we cry out, en masse, to a faceless god and a cold, indifferent universe that holds its secrets close. What... rasps the death rattle of our collective sanity. What is the lubrication level of Samantha Jones's 52-year-old vagina? Has the change of life dulled its sparkle? Do its aged and withered depths finally chafe from the endless pounding, pounding, pounding—cruel phallic penance demanded by the emotionally barren sexual compulsive from which it hangs? If I do not receive an update on the deep, gray caverns of Jones, I shall surely die!

new Franzen

The one who’d been subsisting on Yoplait and radishes was in the bathroom, changing her hair color again.

cobra venom

"Young’s antics were all part of an attempt to show just how spitting cobras make their shots. Their venom is a potent defensive weapon, but it’s also completely useless if it lands on the skin or even in the mouth. To work, the cobra must aim for the eyes.

Just think about how hard that is. The cobra must hit a moving target that’s up to 1.5 metres away, using a squirt gun attached to their mouth. The fang is fixed with no movable nozzle for fine-tuned aiming. And the venom spray lasts just 50 milliseconds – not long enough to correct the stream after watching its arc."

Sol Korine "Mouth Music"

watch the full film here

gayngs the walker

Important Questions of the Day Not Involving Landis Armstrong Etc.

If I gave a shit about grown men who chase each other around the mountains on ten-speed bikes, today would be a mind fuck. Luckily I don't. In my day we called it "ditch." also: transportation. So here's Bethlehem Shoals:



So much for Howard needing to prove something about how good he is in this series.

Not only did the Big Guy escape unscathed (except for the loss), he also found an important defender in Jeff Van Gundy. JVG said, in essence, that we might just have to accept Howard for what he is: a superstar on defense who will always be limited at the other end. Otis Smith believes Dwight is on Bill Russell's level as a defensive force. Van Gundy, far more rationally, used Russell as an extremely favorable example of how a player can stink at offense but still prove incredibly valuable.

Mark Jackson wasn't having it. He pointed to Rajon Rondo's improved outside shooting, and asked why Howard couldn't add a little something to his game over the summer like Rondo did.

MOVIE STILLS ETC

HERE

Today’s Nagging Question started forming a couple days ago when I saw a beer-thickened guy about my age in a too-small Larry Biittner Cubs jersey while I was riding the Blue Line home from work. I knew Larry Biittner’s faintly acrid expression from my shoebox of cards, but little else, so I looked into it a bit and found out that he was a part-time player who was something of a Joe Shlabotnikesque favorite in Chicago during the late ’70s. In other words, he seems to have been the guy certain lonely bespectacled kids might most wanted to have found in a pack of baseball cards, despite his lack of widespread stardom...

SIGN UP BEFORE IT SELLS OUT

Faculty:
Thomas Beller
Jason Brown
Martha McPhee
Saïd Sayrafiezadeh

Visiting Writers:
David Berman
Mary Gaitskill
Rivka Galchen
David Goodwillie
James Lasdun
Sam Lipsyte
Phillip Lopate
Lara Vapnyar
Edmund White

if you haven't read this interview yet, your pets and children should be turned over to the state.

What other blogs do you read?

I read Feminista and Fitted Sweats. Also, Melissa Walker’s blog. Do you have a blog? I’d read that too. I better say I read The Frisky, right? I should also say I read TheGloss and Coilhouse, because they asked me to write for them. If anyone writes nice things about Fallen Princess, then I read those blogs.

Just LOOK

PREAKNESS 2010 or 1968

Think of it as a perfect marriage of Ray Conniff and Ray Kerrison.

worst wedding dj worst video worst drummer

GAYNGS/ RELAYTED at pitchfork....

So Relayted is both better than it had any right to be, given the concept, and about as good as you could expect from the musicians involved. It has all the signs of a gag that got out of hand-- three guys from Minneapolis bantering about soft-rock namedrops who eventually found themselves surrounded by enough smart, likeminded musicians that it somehow wound up destined to sound at least somewhat heartfelt. It's a joke told in reverse, with a potentially cheesy setup that often comes with a surprisingly poignant payoff. Go into this expecting irony, and it might turn your stomach. Take it sincerely, and it'll hit you about a foot higher.

Come to New York LeBron!!!!!

I was going to write a long response to this, but why? It's sooo simple.

LeBron: You can make a billion...and work for this guy.




Wait...I'm not finished yet. Don't you want to play with Chris Bosh? What about Eddy Curry? The Knicks haven't cut him yet! It will be awesome!

"You are eighteen-year old girl who live in small city of Japan," it starts. This is, by Cuomo's own admission, a song about an actual letter—an actual girl. Pay attention to the age, because it's going to be important later. Anyway, this girl likes Rivers Cuomo's music, and she wants to know what his favorite foods and hobbies are. Which, of course, Rivers Cuomo takes to mean that she wants to know what it is like to ride the Rivers Cuomo Train to Pleasure-Town, Population: Rivers Cuomo.

LT UPDATE...

...and maybe not!